I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize
