just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
