party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
