overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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