Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
Randomize
