you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
