It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
