im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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