i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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