Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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