Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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