Quick, to the slutcave!
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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