i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
