I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
