well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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