You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize