WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
