your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
