No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Randomize
