i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
He kissed a someone with a penis
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
im on a boat
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