But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Screwed.edu
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
