ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
