mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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