Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
