i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
