o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
