I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
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