My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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