whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Randomize
