Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
