Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
