on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
