Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
