Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
