everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
