I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
is wine microwaveable?
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
