making cat noises will not fix the situation.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
