Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
