Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Alive.
So much puke
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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