I bet he comes in French.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
