bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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