He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
