it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
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