I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
