my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
