sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
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