Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
