question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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