Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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