Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
